I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
