dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
