he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
