i barfeds in our rink
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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