I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
