Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Actions speak louder than pants.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
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