I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
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