is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
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