Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
50% drunk capacity currently
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Randomize
