is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize