But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
