She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Randomize
