I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
