He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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