so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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