Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
