just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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