idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
