Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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