he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
there was a trapeze. enough said
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
