If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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