You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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