Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
