I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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