her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
