im gay
i know
yea but for you.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
You left your phone here
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