I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
