Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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