Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
