I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
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