I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
