she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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