Will you blow on my dice?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
