I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
