Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize