i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize