Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
My ATM looks so different sober.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
