Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
