Where did you get a picture of my penis
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize