Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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