your thong is hanging out like whoa
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
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