I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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