I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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