matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Randomize
