we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
