Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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