he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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