Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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