after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize