Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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