I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
